Sex Addiction Counseling:
The Top 3 Myths

People not familiar with sex addiction often joke about it, probably because it makes them nervous and uncomfortable.

Sex Addiction Counseling Myth #1: Sex Addiction is About Sex

People not familiar with sex addiction often joke about it, probably because it makes them nervous and uncomfortable.   They might even say things like, “That’s an addiction I’d like to have.”  If sex is pleasurable, then how could anyone get too much of it?

Aside from this discomfort, there is a myth underneath this attitude, the myth that sex addiction is about sex, when in fact it is about childhood trauma and abuse.  The sex addiction itself is actually an expression or symptom of underlying problems that have nothing directly to do with sex as a pleasurable and intimate activity.

So no, sex addiction is not an addiction you would like to have.

Sex Addiction Counseling Myth #2: Sex Addiction Counselors are all Experts in Sex Addiction Therapy

When does sexual behavior become a problem or an addiction?  Most of us would assume that a sex addiction counselor would know the answer to this, but not all do.  Instead, many are focused on being “sex positive”, meaning helping someone overcome shame and inhibitions around sex.  While this can be healthy, it does not go deep enough into underlying issues and will ultimately leave a patient in sex addiction counseling unsatisfied.

Sex Addiction Counseling Myth #3: You will Set The Agenda for Your Own Sex Therapy

Many people correctly assume that they themselves will come up with the issues and concerns that guide their therapy.  Unfortunately, some sex addiction counselors have an agenda.  This agenda could be driven by any number of theories or approaches to sexual health, but any agenda that does not derive directly from a healthy and open relationship between the sex addiction counselor and the patient is doomed to failure.

It’s not about the theory, it’s about finding the therapist that works for you.